I have the desire and have been trying to do my MBA for quiet sometime now. I have had multiple hits at this dream of mine. If anyone knows what is the taste of failure and the depth of despair it brings, it has to be ME and only ME. Once I got so close to getting the coveted British Chevening full scholarship and I messed it up. How did I mess it up? Man I am even ashamed to think about it. That incident clearly showed me how immature I was. It is a different topic to discuss on how mature I am now! Some people say everything that happens, happens for the good. I am of the opinion this is just a solace for people who fear looking at life’s reality in the eye.
Recently I read some speech by Steve Jobs, he talked about connecting the dots. He says, “You can't connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something — your gut, destiny, life, karma”, whatever. Now how will the incident of probably being rejected an admit into an university-MBA fit into my life later? At this point with the limited view, of the future I stand no chance at connecting anything that is happening in my life forget the dots. However, being the person Steve Job is, I will give him the benefit of doubt and probably look at this later in my life and see how I will be able to connect these dots!
As for now I am waiting, and waiting for the Ad comm. to respond to my application and mail. I have been waiting for something or the other all my life. During my waits, I sometimes feel I have been doing nothing but waiting all my life. Even before I was born, I had to wait for my parents to decide it was time for them to get their last progeny on this planet. After being born, I had to wait for my nanny to change my diapers. I had to wait for my mom to come back from work and spend time with me. I had to wait for my sister to come out of the bathroom in the morning. I had to wait for the school days to get over to join college. I had to wait until the movie ended to stop laughing when I saw ‘Jaane Bhi Do Yaaron’(Indian movie). I had to wait for my girlfriend at the coffee shop. I had to wait for my overseas opportunity, now I am waiting for the response from the Ad comm. Will I ever stop waiting?
Let me end this rant with my version of Steve jobs ending statement. ‘Stay Hungry Stay Selfish and try not to wait’
